TRAFFIC JAMS -R.I.Ping FOURTEEN SEATERS

A few days ago rain started falling while I was in town at the evening. It always rains cats, dogs and all the canines and rodents when I get late in the city centre, kinda jinxed.  As usual matatus triple the fare and the day was no exception.  Fourteen seaters are the notorious ones and they happen to be the only ones serving my home route. They suddenly decided to triple the fare which is not surprising. I boarded the matatu happily while everybody else hesitated. A completely rare occurrence coming from me. Reason? I had few choice words reserved for the driver and conductor. I did not choose to have an idiotic brain, blabber mouth and a critical perspective of everything, it just happened. The moment the conductor asked for my fare I paid him promptly and accompanied it with “mnaringa na next year hamna job mtakuwa mnatarmark kaa sisi ama mkuwe worse” with a loud voice for listening pleasure of all in the vicinity. Passengers burst out laughing. Need I say I was nearly thrown out to the rain in the middle of anywhere [I had no idea where we were]

Some cleaver chaps in the government decided that the fourteen seaters were the mother of all the stubborn traffic jams in the city which is a half truth. Anybody with a memory more than pea size will ascertain that the time matatus went on a strike your vitz could only arrive at westlands by an amazing miracle [if there is anything of the sort]

I have some serious issues with traffic jams. I happen to be late most of times and they make me later. I do not really understand how it happens. May be fading it to oblivion is better, seeing the answer won’t change the situation. I get late for meetings and classes, then disappoint friends though I don’t think much of them. Sometimes I am hungry and a jam adds angry on my face and stomach still.

Unlike the not-so-cleaver government chaps, I do not blame the mats for my road woes. Our poor imitations of highways only serve to thicken the jams. Then the craze which has attacked nairobians, vitz and proboxs. They stall everywhere blocking the little space available. My sleep comes next; I currently hold the world record of pressing the snooze button on my alarm. I am proud of it. My sleep is never over before I press it for more than 15 times with 15 minute intervals.